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Hi friends! So full disclosure – I’m no stranger to online dating. I’ve probably met half of the partners I’ve dated online (although not always specifically from online dating sites). I like it for two reasons – I’m an introvert and so it takes off a bit of pressure from me to be “on” in person all the time and it also gives me the freedom to be spontaneous! I’m currently single and as I figure out which people will have the pleasure of spontaneously (and not so spontaneously) being in my pants (sorry, mom!), I’ve come across a LOT of shenanigans.
Like dudes pretending they are James Deen on their online dating profiles, only to change their photo to some nondescript random person when I ask if they are really him. If you don’t know who James Deen is, that link goes to a Wikipedia page about him but I wouldn’t google him if you’re at work. Just saying! Needless to say, this person didn’t pass the first “don’t be fake” test!
If you’re lucky to go on a date or two (or more like three) with me, then there’s always that chance that things will go extremely well. One of the cool things about personal lubricants is that they’re rad for all kinds of different sex, including non-hetero sex or marathon sex sessions. KY has this product called KY Liquibeads that you can insert every few days if you want to be sure that you’re ready when the mood strikes. I picked up a box at Walmart because I was curious and even though my sex life isn’t always hoppin,’ when it is, I don’t want to have to worry about any kind of uncomfortable friction – only the good kind for me please!
That’s rare though – because I am normally being bombarded with silliness like this (or MUCH worse). Don’t get me wrong – I LOVE it when people I’m dating can make me laugh. It is thee best thing. But seeing this on your profile doesn’t tell me too much about you, other than you are either funny or good at googling jokes – both good qualities, not enough to get me to pay attention to you, unless your joke is like SUPER funny.
And don’t even get me started on profile photos. Ok, I LOVE Chunk from The Goonies and I love Falkor from The Neverending Story. But I kinda want to see what you look like instead. Especially if you take photos like the guy in the middle – because I probably want to stay away from your dramatic badly tattooed person. The person on the right has the right idea – let every one know that they are free of STIs via a handwritten note. Why not get right to the point, right? Maybe this is smart though – it IS on Tinder…
If you happen to find yourself totally won over by someone you met online, using KY Liquibeads is totally easy. All you need to do is put one of the inserts onto an applicator and insert it inside of you. You can use one every few days but don’t use more than one per 24 hour period. Oh and please consult a doctor before using if you are pregnant or breastfeeding. You can insert it 30 minutes before sex to feel the effects, which is cool because even if you don’t need to use personal lubricants, sex with lube can be a totally different and new experience!
As for me, I think I’m going to settle for Groot. We have a decent match on OkCupid and I’m really into nature.
Don’t forget, KY Liquibeads can add some extra fun to your sex life whether you’re single or dating someone/s! There’s no shame in needing or wanting a little more lubrication when you’re getting down. And because I love you, here’s a $1.00 off coupon from Coupons.com! Happy (safe & consensual) sexin’ babes!